In honor of National Sons Day, (who comes up with these?) I’m going to share the birth story of my second child, who is also my second son.
Better Late Than Never, I Suppose…
I was 40 weeks and 5 days along. My brain convinced me that the birth of this baby wasn’t going to happen until exactly 42 weeks. Then he would share a birthday with his brother two years apart. My first had been stubborn and come early. My second was being stubborn and coming late. I had wanted him to come in April so that they would at least have separate birthday months. Not in the plans, I guess.
There had been a few different days of unproductive cramping, so I was trying not to get my hopes up when they did happen. I woke up at 5:55 that morning cramping. I thought to myself, “I bet it’s gas,” and moved on. A couple hours later I realized it was kind of coming in waves, but again, tried not to get my hopes up. I casually informed my mom and sister in Kansas. My mom asked if she could come in that day (turns out she already had tickets to fly down ). Of course I said yes. I didn’t want her to waste her time off if it wasn’t the real deal, but the following day the midwife planned to strip my membranes in hopes of jump starting labor, so I thought chances were up that I might be in labor within a few days.
Little Man and I ran to Trader Joe’s with my MIL and grandmother-in-law to grab some groceries I had forgotten over the weekend. We grabbed something to eat and headed home around 10:30. My grandmother-in-law laughed at the idea of me carrying a 2 year old around like nothing while I was in labor. I was just going about my normal routines.
I cuddled with Little Man and we ate our lunch. Then I put Little Man down for a nap, took a shower, and laid down for a nap myself. The cramping didn’t stop, though it seemed to calm a bit. I woke up every 20-30 minutes, but was convinced it wasn’t going to amount to anything.
I sent a message to my sister asking if there was any update on their plans. She had planned to come in later that week, but my mom never told me is she was for sure coming down. She told me mom was probably in the air. Suddenly my mom messaged asking if Little Man was napping. I told her he was and should be waking soon. She responded, “Okay, I won’t ring the doorbell.” She was outside on my driveway! I was pleasantly shocked!
Things Started Heating Up…
We relaxed and chatted, and we played with Little Man. My husband came home early for the day, and contractions got a little more intense. Since they kept slowing down when I laid down, I still wasn’t convinced it was really happening.
I called the midwife for perspective. It was 4:58 PM. I wanted to call before closing to know if it was something worth watching or not. After explaining my symptoms, she told me to feel free to come in for a check if I wanted. She was already there with another laboring mama and wouldn’t be leaving any time soon. We decided to go in. I hung up a little disappointed. There was no definite answer to my situation. I didn’t want to go in only to be sent home. My MIL came over to get Little Man, and we set off for the birth center with mom following.
To the Birthing Center…
We arrived around 5:30. I waited out a contraction at the car. I was about 6 minutes apart. My mom later said that she knew I was in labor when she saw me leaning against the car. She also said that my lips were swollen and red when she had arrived. She had always known that as a sign of labor. We went upstairs and waited out another contraction. The midwife checked me and said, “Well, I’m glad you came in, you are at 7 cm!” My husband sent a text to family that it was “go time.”
They started prepping the birthing tub and taking my vitals. My Husband got our bags, and my mom came upstairs. I hung out on the birthing ball to help relax through contractions. At both births the available birthing balls completely let me down. I guess mine at home is either thicker than most, or just more inflated. The one at the hospital for Little Man was too soft and squishy, and so was this one. I like the counter pressure of a good birthing ball. Oh well.
Eventually the water was ready and I got in the tub. The warmth immediately felt good. I laid in the water and worked through contractions as they started getting super intense. This is the part where all the books say you start doubting yourself. I kept thinking, “come on already!” I didn’t feel like I was progressing, I was waiting for that urge to push, but it just wasn’t happening.
Progress Over Plans…
Just like my last labor, I started overheating. They placed ice cold washcloths on my head, but I was battling a warm tub of water. The warmth felt great on my abdomen, but I was also sweating and getting uncomfortable. I decided to ditch the tub, which meant ditching a water birth.
I got out and got on the bed. The midwife and attendant were trying to dry me off. All I could think was, “Hello, trying to birth a baby, I don’t have time/energy to move just the way you want me!” For a bit, laying on my side worked. The birth assistant, Debbie, helped by applying pressure and massaging my lower back and hips. The midwife, Kristen, told me she really felt it was time to push. I told her I thought so too, but didn’t feel the urge. She said okay and let me do my thing.
Eventually my side wasn’t working anymore, and just like with Little Man, I ended up on my hands and knees on the bed, face planted into a stack of pillows. My husband stood on the edge of the bed and let me hold/crush his thumbs with each contraction. I started trying to push, but I still felt like I was getting nowhere! It was not motivating at all!
Time to Push…
Eventually my water broke. It was a very weird feeling. It had broken early in labor with my first labor, so it was a new experience this time around. Once it broke, the real urge to push came on, as well as I suddenly felt like I was making progress when I pushed. Finally! I was ready to be done!
I pushed, and I pushed, for what seemed like forever, though I’m sure it was a lot less time than I perceived. Soon I felt the stretching and was waiting for the midwife to see his little head for some motivation! When I first heard him cry I was a bit confused, because I knew he wasn’t out yet. The midwife told me that he was the first baby she had seen start crying before even their mouth was fully out! Once I delivered his head, I could tell the midwife was doing something. I remember asking, “What in the world are you doing down there?!??” Heh. She told me baby was trying to figure out which way his shoulders were going to come out!
Soon he was out, the midwife was asking me to sit up, and she was passing my baby through my legs onto my chest. I laid on the bed, kind of just collapsing where I could. I laid him on my chest and we cuddled as I caught my breath. The midwife and other staff cleaned up as the shaking started up for me. I remember hating the shaking so much with my first labor. I was shaking so much from all the adrenaline that my teeth were clattering, and I remember getting angry. This time the shaking wasn’t quite as intense, so it was much more manageable.
My husband came over to cuddle with us and we just had some time to be together. I don’t really have a sense of time at points like this in delivery. Eventually the cord stopped pulsing and my husband cut it. I delivered the placenta and they made sure it was healthy and all there. She showed me the slightly textured surface and explained that it was due to being past due and starting to deteriorate. So crazy!
All Stitched Up…
The next step was stitches. I didn’t thinking much about it since I hadn’t noticed much with my first. Well I’m not sure what difference there was, but it hurt like crazy this time! I don’t remember getting numbing shots the first time. The stitches only felt like pulling sensations, though, so there must have been something! This time I felt all FOUR of the shots, and I let them know very audibly. Then at one point she stitched a part that wasn’t numb and that wasn’t fun either. I was letting her know too that I hadn’t had this experience with my first and she said she felt badly. I didn’t mean to make her feel badly, but I just needed to voice the pain and differences between deliveries at the time.
After she finished they left us to check on the other mama giving birth, and to give us our “golden hour” together. We cuddled and I chatted with my mom and husband. It was hot in there and I was sweating despite only wearing a sheet! Turns out the other mama was freezing since the house was old and they were trying to cool my side of the house that was in the sun. They couldn’t cool it anymore since the other mama was close to birth and the new baby needed to be warm.
The birth assistant came in off and on to check on us and our vitals. I handed baby to my husband to cuddle while the assistant helped me to the birthing tub for a quick soak. The water felt amazing.
The midwife came back to weight and measure the baby, as well as to run through the healthy newborn check list. He weighed 7 pounds and 12 ounces. My husband rounded up to 8 pounds because he had pooped on me twice and peed on me once shortly after birth. Even the midwife seemed surprised by how much he peed!
Homeward Bound…
He passed all his birth tests and they left us alone for a while again to be with the other mama birthing. Soon they brought us discharge papers to sign and helped us out to the car around 11:30 PM. My husband and I went home to go to sleep while my mother went to the grocery store. We were home and in bed by midnight, and starting the newborn phase with another adorable baby!
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