Mommy wars. I hate them. So much.
I am a firm believer that everyone should do what works best for themselves and their kiddos when it comes to parenting. Not all parents are the same, not all kids are the same. What worked for your first kid, might not work for your second. What worked for your sister, might not work for you, that’s okay! Love your kids, raise them how you want to raise them, and be supportive of your mom friends who are roughing it without a manual just like you!
Then One Day a Lightbulb Went Off…
I listen to Way FM radio, a Christian radio station. Brant Hanson is on there. He is one of the only DJs that I actually enjoy listening to…and actually listen to instead of changing stations. He just cracks me up. One day he said something that was both a “well duh” moment to me, and a “eureka!” I mean it was so simple and true that I didn’t know how I hadn’t thought of it, but it was just to eye opening.
I don’t remember the exact words, but he was talking about how we as humans don’t like to be wrong, and we really hate it when it’s proven that we are wrong and have done wrong. He then went on to use an example about his family. His kids don’t watch Disney movies. He said it wasn’t a moral choice or anything, he simply doesn’t think they are good, so they don’t watch them. When by chance this would come up in conversation with other parents, he was often met with anger and hostility. He then said that when people hear that they don’t watch Disney, they translate it as you think they are bad for letting their kids watch Disney.
Wait, what?!
That makes so much sense!
I know, I’m probably so far behind the game. Everyone else probably already knew that…but a light went off in my head. I have always hated mommy wars and didn’t know why everyone had to attack each other when parents are already stressed out enough trying to keep our kids alive.
Let me tell you some things…
I cloth diaper, but I don’t care if you use disposables. I use disposables at night…and usually when I travel. If I see you use cloth diapers, I might geek out a little and want to chat diapers…but that’s a different topic!
We don’t eat much sugar (usually none) but I’m going to smile at the adorable ice cream mustache your kiddo has, not deem you a bad parent.
Homeopathic medicine is my preference for as much as possible…that doesn’t mean I’m going to protest people using antibiotics (I was on them a few weeks back for a sinus infection).
We may not agree on all things…heck, even my parenting is constantly evolving…but that doesn’t mean we have to judge each other for being different. Find what works for you and your family right now and just do it. Stop caring what others think. It’s your family, you know them best. Then, if it doesn’t work, don’t be scared to change it up. Life is full of seasons. We all grow and learn new things and have to adjust our way of life. Parenting fits right into that.
We need to let go of the mom guilt and just love and support one another! Just say not to Mommy Wars.
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