Lazy Days and a Love of Learning | Unexpected Joy

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I feel as though I’m constantly talking about “this crazy time we live in.” I suppose it’s just going to be the running theme for some time. The world has been flipped upside down for most of us and we are all navigating some form of uncertainty and anxiety. It’s a time of great divide AND bonding. I have been doing my best to think of the good things happening in life right now, and the topic of Unexpected Joy is the perfect way to reflect.

Lazy Days

There has been a lot of laying around and relaxing, watching movies together and playing games, and days of getting practically nothing done. There have also been lots of snuggles, reading, storytelling, giggles, and exploration. The need for a daily rhythm, for joy to take our minds off what we COULDN’T do, has been strong.

At first the boys didn’t really understand. They just thought it was life as normal. But as time passed, and they weren’t getting to see grandparents, they started to ask questions. They started to complain. And we explained as best as we could. Today it actually brings a smile to my face when my oldest lists off who he wants to meet, or what he wants to do when “the pandemic is over.”

So we continued on our lazy days, playing outside, exploring the world, and learning together. I have a very laid back “homeschool” approach. My oldest is only 5, so we mainly learn through play, reading, and observing. I actively express fascination, wonder, and curiosity in the world around me, pointing out “everyday” things to my kids.

Do you hear that beeping? I think it’s a truck.

Look at those birds flying across the field! Aren’t they beautiful?

These water beads feel very slick and squishy!

I’m not perfect, by any means, but I try my best. I think my artistic and introvert natures help since I’m constantly watching and observing in life. I love to take things in. As time has gone by I’ve noticing my boys are trying it out as well. My youngest is starting to tell BIG stories with great enthusiasm, and gets excited about the little things he notices in nature. My oldest is making observations about what he sees and tests out, and is making theories about what would happen if he did x, y, or z. And it all brings a smile to my face.

A Love of Learning

I don’t know if it’s an obsession, or a blessing, but I love learning. I love trying new things. Learning new techniques on my own, and just building my knowledge. I don’t always retain it all, but I enjoy learning about people, how things work, and how to do just about anything.

As a homeschool mom, I’ve devoured a lot of homeschooling books over the last few years, and many, if not all, of them talk about cultivating a love of learning in your kids vs memorizing things for a test. Something I wholeheartedly stand behind. I was GREAT at regurgitating things for tests in school and then completely forgetting it all. So I actively try to teach the boys about loving to learn, without being demanding. Their natural desire to learn about the world, and the people around them, will hopefully be their fuel in life.

This time of being home, of being on our own more, and using nature as an outlet, has cultivated that love of learning even more. I’m sure it’s partially about the ages that they are currently at, but This time together, and even the need to explain the situation, has definitely helped. We all have need the distraction from what we “couldn’t” do, by focusing on what we could do. We could collect acorns and use them to learn math, we could grow a garden and learn to take care of it and protect it from all the “bad” bugs. Learned about our families, plants, animals, strengthening our bodies, cooking, cleaning, reading, and taking care of others. We’ve also learned about our limits, forgiveness, stress, and the need for downtime.

Emotional Intelligence

One of my “passion” topics is emotional intelligence and the need to be able to express ourselves. It has been on my mind and heart for years, and has only grown with found resources through the years.

Both Brene Brown and Marc Brackett, in his book Permission to Feel, talk about our limited abilities to express and define our emotions, as well as our need to express them in positive ways. This turbulent time, even for my 3 and 5 year olds, who as time went by, began showing signs of emotional distress, definitely created an environment ripe for learning about emotions. It also created an even greater NEED for learning about and processing emotions.

Even more than ever, my boys and I have been talking about emotions. Giving them names, expressing regret and forgiveness, and talking about emotions in a positive way. I try my best to teach them that emotions are not bad, they are necessary. It’s only the way we respond to those emotions that can be positive or negative. Anger is okay, and understandable, hitting it not.

With young ones, as with most things, it’s a constant repetitive response, but I think, and hope, it will stick over time. I never want them to think they have to hide, or control their emotions. Sometimes we need a good cry, or we need to vent about the anger we are feeling. We just don’t need to hurt anyone else to do it. Sometimes the truth hurts, but there is always a more positive, and heart focused way to express it.

This all includes me too. I have days where I feel like I just cannot do it. And I tell them. I voice my feelings, and ask them for support. Those are the days that can be really lazy days. But the unexpected joy is the comfort and consideration my boys will often take with me. Caring for me, being with me, and being happy with simply being next to me.

I also have days where anger and frustration are strong. Where I can reach my limit and end up having to apologize and ask for forgiveness from my boys. I try to never miss an opportunity to ask for forgiveness form my boys when I’ve done something that I shouldn’t. In doing so, I’ve seen their own willingness to apologize, and forgive, grow. We are all teaching each other.

I’ll try not to fall down my rabbit hole of obsession with this topic, but it’s definitely worth looking into!

The Small Things

All of the above just helps me remember that sometimes it’s the small things that bring unexpected joy. And sometimes the small things are also big things in life. They add up, they build to greater things, and they weave joy into our lives.

So in this “crazy time,” take moments to think about, write down, and reflect on what’s going “right” in your world. What’s creating smiles, connections, and building up you and your family. Hold those things close to your heart for days where it all seems to be coming apart at the seams.

Where have you found unexpected joy?

This post is part of a blog hop with Exhale—an online community of women pursuing creativity alongside motherhood, led by the writing team behind Coffee + Crumbs. Click here to view the next post in this series “Unexpected Joy”.